Imi is the founder of Eggshell Therapy and Coaching, working with intense people from around the world. She is the author of Emotional Sensitivity and Intensity, available in multiple languages, and The Gift of Intensity. Imi Lo is a consultant for emotionally intense and highly sensitive people. As time goes by, you become good at camouflaging- saying what others need to hear and presenting yourself in a socially acceptable way. Perhaps deep down, you do not feel you deserve time, attention, and care from others Perhaps when you do show your vulnerabilities, you are plagued with guilt and shame, so you would rather hold things in. However, no matter how much you are struggling, you are likely to downplay or hide your distress and put on a stoic facade to the outside world. You are Calm on the Outside but Suffer on Insideĭue to an innately hypersensitive nervous system and/or the Complex PTSD you might have experienced, you constantly live with low-grade anxiety, which can escalate into a panic when triggered by particular stressors. Here Are Some Specific Symptoms That Characterize Quiet BPD What Is Quiet BPD? 9 Signs You Are Suffering In Silence 1.
Related: 7 Surprising Positive Aspects Of BPD In the middle of it, the future looks blank. When someone upsets you, do you withdraw from them without having first trying to speak to them?ĭo you deep down believe your very existence is a burden to others?ĭo you mentally dissociate and feel empty and numb?ĭo you live in denial of the anger you feel? Perhaps to the point where you don’t know how ‘anger’ feels anymore?ĭo you spiral into crushing depression or tend to isolate yourself at the slightest mistake you feel you have made in your interactions with people?Īre there incidences where you have cried for days, stayed in bed, and remained unmotivated without anyone knowing? This keeps you in a loop of quiet suffering for a long time.ĭo you have a high need for control and don’t know what to do in situations where there is no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’? Even if they try, you do not allow them to help you. Built into Quiet BPD is the ability to tolerate distress and avoid outwardly expressing their needs.
Instead of seeking help, you withdraw from those who care for you. When you have emotional needs, you tend to numb out or dissociate. Quiet BPD is more dangerous than the classic form of the disease because it’s tough to fathom the emotional distress inside you.
Instead of other reactions like ‘ fight’, ‘flight’, you’ freeze’ in the face of trauma and pain. People with Quiet BPD tend to have an avoidant attachment style many have comorbid Avoidant Personality Disorder traits. You would rather be in pain than affect other people, so you hold everything in. Your arms may be covered with scars from self-harming, and you hide them.ĭeep inside, you may feel that your emotions are wrong, you are ‘too much’ for others, your existence itself is a burden, or you don’t deserve a place in the world. You may not act out impulsively, but when you reach a breaking point, you still engage in self-harming or self-sabotaging behaviors of different forms. When you are triggered, rarely do you lash out at others, but you go into isolation and engage in self-injurious behaviors.
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